hello:D

2011-05-17T00:06:00.002+08:00

i really admire people who have good diction. it is as though those words flow and come naturally to them. it is simply amazing to realise how words alone can effectively describe the state of emotion one is feeling. i can NEVER describe how i feel in words. i am not blessed with that talent. :(
ct2 coming soon :)
this week is going to be the last week we are going to the old folks home to do service. i will definitely go back there again after my a-levels. really inspiring talking to the people there. :)
life is wonderful (at least for now). :)

2011-05-10T18:18:00.003+08:00

and so the dean's list came out today. i am glad i made it up onto the dean's list again. this time for both bio and chem, fulfilling one of my new year resolutions yeah, of getting up onto the dean's list again :) the list apparently doesn't show one's failure. actually, i think i did quite horribly for CTs. it was only pure luck that i could squeeze my way up onto the list and no, i believe i am not humble. pure luck indeed.
i need to work even harder for CT 2. :)) it is coming. hopefully, i can be lucky again and get a place onto that list again. :))
i have chem SPA tmrw. wish me luck man. it is the race against time.

2011-05-09T09:10:00.003+08:00

i really should be studying for Bio and Chem SPA but I thought I should spend some time to blog about how I feel about the GE this year.
I totally understand Singaporeans' need and want for change in the Parliament. After all, greater competition leads to better efficiency. But sometimes, the more things change, the more things stay constant. In their quest for change, what price has Singapore had to pay? We have lost good ministers like our Foreign Minister George Yeo, whose dedication to Singapore is really boundless. Change is possible but at what price? I read the newspapers this morning and learned that regional leaders too are shocked that our Foreign Minister was defeated this elections. Mr George Yeo has earned himself international and regional respect and his position simply cannot be replaced overnight.
Singaporeans say they want change because they feel their voices are not heard in the Parliament. They feel that their concerns such as the increasing cost of living are not addressed. HELLO?!?! To me, it is naive to think that by voting the opposition into Parliament, these issues will just disappear. These are issues that the whole world is facing too. These issues cannot be addressed overnight. It is easy for opposition parties to nitpick on the mistakes that the PAP have made and give a super persuasive speech, promising Singaporeans of a better future. But seriously, these are words anyone can say, translating these words into actions is a lot harder. No, i am not a pro-PAP person, nor am I a pro-opposition person.
I am just indignant. I am indignant over the fact that we have lost good ministers like Mr Chiam See Tong (who has wholeheartedly served Potong Pasir) and Foreign Minister George Yeo. It is saddening. I am indignant too because according to my friend, many Aljunied citizens vote the opposition just for the sake of voting. Excuse me?!?! Every vote counts and these people who do not take their votes seriously are doing a great disservice to Singapore by their very own actions.
Then again, we should all give time to let the opposition prove themselves in Parliament. I do not doubt their capabilities but I am just indignant that capable talents in Parliament are voted out! :(
This GE marks a new political landscape for Singapore. I believe that in the next election, there will be more opposition parties surfacing. The next GE will be my turn to vote. I am super excited because it makes me feel I have a stake in this country. Democracy - for the people, by the people. HEEHEE. I will make sure my vote is thought through carefully and not vote just for the sake of voting. I will go attend the rallies. :)) super exciting :))
AHHHHH! i am really sad that capable talents are lost. :( But new talents are entering the Parliament too, so that is good. Hopefully, competition will keep PAP on their toes and Singapore can continue to prosper :) woohooo, I LOVE SINGAPORE. hahahaha. :))

2011-05-07T12:08:00.002+08:00

because everytime i come back from the old folks home, i feel a sense of warmth. :))

2011-05-06T18:21:00.003+08:00

i cannot seem to will myself to hate you or "de-friend" you because i truly treasure this friendship. sigh, throughout the first half of the day at school today, i kept super quiet (okay relatively quiet as compared to my usual self) because i was sad and was emo-ing. haha.
but GP lesson and my classmates made me laugh again <3 <3 <3 haha. i really love love love my class.
my sore throat isn't healing and yet i am still munching on hello panda. i am addicted to it. like seriously, since last year. :))

when you waved at me today, i could only afford you a weak smile. i need time, time to convince myself you didn't betray me. i need time to convince myself i am wrong.

2011-05-05T21:28:00.002+08:00

some people are just innately selfish, my close friends included.
it saddens me to think that pragmatism and your own matters matter much more to you than our friendship. thanks a lot. i feel betrayed seriously. the first time you did it to me, i brushed it off and told myself i was being overly sensitive. but time and again, you betrayed me. WTS is this?!?! if this is your true colour, i am sorry i wouldn't want to be your friend anymore. am i just a pawn in your game of life?
and you think just one SORRY over SMS means that i can forgive you? how naive. i would really want and love to treasure this friendship of ours and i even considered you as one of my close friends, but i am greatly appalled by your actions.

because of you, i will harden my heart. i will never be the same friend that you used to know. you catalysed this change in me. you are just a selfish soul, wanting people to accede to your request and never the other way. selfish creature. it was wrong of me to have made a friend like you.
now, i am just sad, VERY SAD. my heart is heavy because i have lost a friendship.

2011-05-02T20:23:00.003+08:00

a few days ago, my younger sister said i was fat.
a few minutes ago, i was told that i have broad and thick shoulders, fat and flabby arms.
i think i have a lot of bye-bye fats. To add to that, I have a bulging tummy. I kid you not.
oh dear. obesity at its worst. FML. :( SELF-ESTEEM ISSUES.

2011-05-01T14:51:00.006+08:00

i just finished looking through a horde of photos (both baby photos as well as my parents' photos) and this strange wave of emotions engulfed me as i was looking through them. :) a nice feeling :) a warm and fuzzy feeling in my heart. reliving childhood memories is so sweet. seeing how mischievous i was in the past would inevitably bring a smile onto my face. it is not as though this is my first time seeing these photos. but everytime i look through these albums, i will have this sense of nostalgia in me. a really awesome feeling that words simply cannot describe. :)
looking through my parents' photos, i realised my mother was quite a stunner. i didn't believe her when she told me she was pretty in the past because there was this stark difference from how she looks like now and then. i guess time will all render us in a state of decrepitude. :( her wedding photos were super pretty and my parents look so loving :)) so sweeeet~ i can never find a guy as sweet and caring as my father (i think). :)) hehe. my father is still sweet and caring to my mother now. :)) my mother recently just cut her finger while cutting apples and my father was the one who dressed her wound and helped her put plaster. small and insignificant but to me, VERY SWEET. :))
i remember when i was young, when my relatives told me i look like my mother, my face would contort into a frown and i would inevitably exclaim "ewwwwwww" very loudly in their face. i remember telling them i would not want to look like my dad or my mum because they are not good-looking. hahahaha. :)) now, i wish i would look like them. i want to be like them. i can never hope for better parents. my mother is the wisest person in the whole wide world to me. seriously. her advices and her sixth sense are always very accurate. :) without her and my father, i think i will not be able to achieve much :))

i love looking at photos because they are a reflection of memories. this is also one of the reasons why i love taking photos (to the extent that people will label it camwhore) because i want these memories (with my friends and family) to be kept alive and ringing in my head.

the warm feeling that i experienced earlier is still resonating within me :) i am relishing every moment of it. i want it to last. i want this feeling to be etched in memory too. :))

i love my parents.
i love my family. what more can i ask for in life? :))
childhood memories. nostalgia. where puerility runs amok :))

2011-05-01T10:09:00.001+08:00

i must strive to be a better person.

2011-04-30T12:52:00.003+08:00

i just came back from doing service at the old folks home :)) i really love doing service there. next week we are going to help to bring the elderly to the polling station so they can cast their votes. :)) super excited :D
there was this this lady who had cancer in her urinary tract area and despite that, she was still very very optimistic. i respect her for that. :)) i really respect every single person because they have so much life stories to tell and so much that i can learn from them. they have been through life longer than i have.
many of them regretted not studying harder when they were younger. oh, many also complained about the increasing cost of living in Singapore. I was speaking to this man and he was telling me that the government only gives him $30 for his monthly allowance. Of course, the government paid for his stay there too. But he was telling me how having $1 a day is not enough. He said it wasn't even enough for him to drink 1 cup of coffee (which costs $1.10). He said his medical expenses can come up to $500 a month, which he obviously could not afford. :(
I talked to many others too. While some were very optimistic (actually few), many were just waiting for death to come to them. they will usually just stone there until someone talks to them and they will not talk to each other. So practically, everyday becomes a stoning session. :(
oh, i found out today that some of them were from woodbridge. they seem perfectly normal to me though.

eeks. i shall go do my GP now. there is another video to watch. :)) yay.

2011-04-30T00:04:00.001+08:00

My sister got into LAWWWWWW :))) i feel so happy for her. hehe. i really really hope i can get into the course i want next year. >.< till then, i shall work hard. LET'S GO~~~~

2011-04-29T21:21:00.004+08:00

i was watching the video on globalisation that mr cheng tasked our class to watch over the weekends. while watching, it triggered some thoughts in me.
in the documentary, thomas friedman who was the director and the narrator of the video was speaking to some village kids in India who were not at the receiving end of the benefits of globalisation. I always had the notion that they were less intelligent than any of us in any developed country but i was obviously wrong. Those kids learn how to use Microsoft Excel, Powerpoint as well as Words at such a young age. I am really super impressed. These kids have grand ambitions too. They all wanted to be astronauts, doctors, chemists and physicists. When I was young, my ambition was to be a cashier (i know this sounds absurd, but yes, i thought it was the coolest job in the world, apart from being a doctor). Their ambitions are starkly different from mine. Even though these kids may not receive the best form of education possible, they are already very mature. Right now, I believe the only obstacle stopping them from realising their dream is the fact that they are stuck in their current socio-economic situation. :( Life is unfair.
You know, I have always been glad that I was selected for ISLE and that I was given a chance to explore the world vastly different from my own. The world out there is so different from what i envisioned it to be. Being in ISLE really allowed me to step out of my comfort zone and allowed me to gain a broader perspective of global issues first-hand. :)) I am glad I was part of this experience and I do not mind going there again. This is one reason why I want to join Doctors Without Borders. To be able to help people in the developing countries and to explore the world out there at the same time, I think it will be a wonderful experience.

I really love GP. GP has helped me widen my perspective about global issues that the world is facing. GP lessons are very entertaining and engaging. Doing well in GP is another thing altogether haha. :))

Life is unfair. But why can't the world be fair? Why can't people in the developing countries receive what we are receiving? Why can't people be less selfish? Why can't all government be transparent and not corrupted? :(( It is possible to just reap the benefits of globalisation and rid the problems of globalisation that come our way? WHY CAN'T THE LOVE BE SPREAD? The world is too complex to decipher. :((
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
haha. i realise my classmates never see this side of me. i think i behave rather retardedly in school. i am always SO loud and laughing SO loudly. haha. hmmm... :))

2011-04-24T18:51:00.001+08:00

love this song by Hey Monday: CANDLES

The power lines went out
And I am all alone
But I don't really care at all
Not answering my phone
All the games you played
The promises you made
Couldn't finish what you started
Only darkness still remains

Lost sight
Couldn't see
When it was you and me

Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
I'm beginning to see the light
Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
But I think I'll be alright

Been black and blue before
There's no need to explain
I am not the jaded kind
Playback's such a waste
You're invisible
Invisible to me
My wish is coming true
Erase the memory of your face

Lost sight
Couldn't see
When it was you and me

Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
I'm beginning to see the light
Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
But I think I'll be alright

One day
You will wake up
With nothing but you’re sorries
And someday
You will get back
Everything you gave me

Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
I'm beginning to see the light
Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
But I think I'll be alright

2011-04-24T14:29:00.002+08:00

my family is just too cute :))
we were on our way home in the car and we were discussing about food in general.

me: you know eating makes me happy. my only gripe is that after eating, i will be DAMN sad.
older sis & younger sis: YEAHHHH!!!
mom: WHY?
younger sis: because i would want to eat more. damn sad because the food is gone.
older sis & me: *gives younger sis a puzzled look*
me: HAHAHAHAHA! i am damn sad because i have to worry about my weight after that. who cares that the food is gone!!!
older sis: YEAH!!! I WAS THINKING OF THAT TOOOO!!!!

my younger sister is such a glutton. hahahaha.

2011-04-22T21:49:00.002+08:00

the human heart is very fickle or so it seems. :( i don't know what i want either.

today, we had OG meeting and sleepover. i did not stay for the sleepover though. :(( i promised myself i will after the a-levels. i must convince my parents :))) i love my OG. :)) i love being around them. they are all wonderful people. people whom i feel very comfortable around. very nonsensical bunch of people but i love them the way they are. HH11 forever. :))

2011-04-20T23:09:00.003+08:00

some people are just damn mean. with regard to such people, i have nothing to say. seriously. they think they are OH SO COOL and all but please, i think they need to do some self-reflection. to bear with such people in life is just irritating.
today we had some canoe activity :)) it was quite fun but very tiring. i think i was a burden to my partner. :((

i feel like crying. i don't know why either.

2011-04-17T21:51:00.002+08:00

omg. i feel dumb. haha

me: eh. this is your earphone. go keep it.
younger sister: *scutinises the earphone* NOT MINE!
me: don't be weird, not yours then whose. your earphone white colour what!
younger sister: THIS IS YOURS!
me: eh, don't be weird. THIS IS YOURS.
me: *scrutinises the earphone" EHHHHHH, IT'S MINE!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAH. *laughs*

such things happen too often. i feel dumb. haha.

2011-04-17T17:46:00.004+08:00

i just came back from jogging 2.4km. i am very sweaty now but it is refreshing. hehe. i am trying to trying to keep fit and fight the flabs. haha.

i realised how AWESOME i am today. haha. after having my phone for like 1+ years, i found out today that my camera has the BLACK and WHITE function. i mean i know every camera has that but i didn't know mine existed when i experimented with my phone when i first got it. super loser right. hahaha. so i tested taking a picture with it.

quite nice right? i wanted to use this as my FB PP but my younger sister said i look horrible here. hehe. :))

ahhhhhhh, my thing came. :(((( BAD. i can only pray it will end on tuesday so i can canoe on wednesday :(( i hope it will not rain on wednesday too. hehe. :)) rain rain go away.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

went to FB and i was looking through some things and i realised in comparison to others, i did REALLY BADLY for CTs. i didn't know i fared so badly. oh dearie me. SHUT THE CRAP. I AM GOING TO WORK EXTRA EXTRA HARD NOW. i lack the willpower, or so it seems. i keep procrastinating and keep using the computer for entertainment stuff. URGH. I HATE MYSELF. I NEED SELF-REGULATION. i need to immerse myself in work now. kthxbb.

2011-04-16T12:26:00.002+08:00

i just got back from service. it is a very very humbling experience. the people there just have so much to say, their life lessons and their wisdom are just overpowering. their advice and their outlook in life are just stunning. :) i will never get bored from talking to them. :) i can learn so much from them. seriously. i think the young (teenagers like me) should go to old folks home to talk to these people. they just have a lot to offer. :)
oh, today i learnt that there is an old man there who was from raffles. COOL TTM! :))

oh, i think i have the cutest dad in the world. hehe. i love my family. too funny and too cute together. :)) yippeee :) i feel blessed. hahaha.

2011-04-15T23:23:00.003+08:00

i get tired very easily these days! :( i don't know why either! maybe because i am growing OLD. i cannot seem to last till 12 these days. my eyes will inevitably close when doing my homework. urgh. CHEM MOCK SPA next week and i think i am really unprepared. i tried reading through the experiments again and i fell asleep while reading. :(( EEKS.

service tomorrow. YAY. exciting. :))

i really hope that thing gets delayed. :)) i wanna have FUN next wednesday :))))

hehe. i love going to school because whenever i am with my classmates, i laugh A LOT. like really A LOT and really LOUDLY. hahhaha. i love my classmates. hehe. :))

need to go back to studying for chem MOCK SPA :)) but, i shall use FB first. hehe. my FB wall is so boring. bleargh. no more new photos and all.

2011-04-12T23:17:00.002+08:00

i want to get a tumblr because i think it is beautiful :)) hehe. that shall be after A-levels :))

I always feel mediocre. :(( reading chiam's essay today made me feel even more inferior. life sucks. today fazilah and i concluded we were losers because we kept giving ourselves excuses and reasons for why we performed badly for tests. BAD. i need some form of intelligence in me. maybe a miracle will happen and i will be miraculously smart. hehe.
the way i write stuff too is damn childish and all. when i read other people's blog posts, they are so inspirational. mine, on the other hand, is very shallow.

oh and i keep eating non-stop. i eat while studying. i eat while using the computer. every now and then (and i mean every 10 minutes), i will pop by the fridge and peer inside to get something to eat. I AM A GLUTTON.

oh, i realise something too. people tend to type damn cheem stuff when they are emo! WHY???? hahahaha. if being emo enables one to be cheem, i wanna be emo when taking my GP exam. hahahaha.

another thing, when i look at myself in the mirror, i realise i look SO old. like VERY. :(( it seems as though i have aged a lot over the years. ewwww.... okay, i shall go back to doing my math hw. MATHHHHHHH :))) i love doing math sums.

shi tian

2011-04-10T16:55:00.002+08:00

yesterday, i went with carissa, amanda and fazilah to an old folks home to do service there. it was a much much more rewarding experience than tutoring children. the old folks there were so so nice to talk to. hehehe. :) so approachable :)) you know, i always had this misconception that they are there because either they were abused by their children or because their children didn't want them anymore. i was wrong. through the conversations with them, i found out that most of them were there because their children had to work and had no time to take care of them. their children will then take them home to stay for 1 week every month. during school holidays, their children will also bring them on holidays. :)) oh another thing i found out, there was an old man there who was from ACSI originally. hehehe. super cool please. :)) also, he told me how he chased his wife. i love talking to them, partially because i love talking to people. :)) this service allowed me to clear some misconceptions of them. cannot wait for the next session!!! the old folks there are SUPER funny and nice to talk to. :))

2011-04-08T22:55:00.002+08:00

got back PW results today. it was such a relief knowing my hard work has paid off. :)) the whole freaking day, i could not concentrate during lessons. i kept looking at the clock and counting down to 12.30pm. it made me even more nervous. hehe. but YAY i got an A so i am really happy. everyone in my group got an A! so yay!!! :))) those late night pracs all paid off. :)) but some people in my class did not do as well even though i feel they rightly deserve to get an A. i cried because i saw them cry. i saw their sad expressions and all and yeah, i started crying.
everyone in my class deserves an A :(((( seriously!! i still feel very very sad for those people who got B. :(((

on a lighter note, CT results are okay except for CHEM. i need to do something about it. dammit. i need to get my A back. >.< i am very very happy for math and bio though. econs is okay. wait till i get GP back. hehe :))

ahhhhhhhh, my blog is so boring but i don't care. :))
tmrw is a long long long day. going out tmrw again with my sister. YIPPEEEEEEE!!!! :)))

shi tian

2011-04-03T00:24:00.003+08:00

i realised i am a really ironic person. you know, after looking at people's photos on FB, i always wish for my life to be as interesting and happening as theirs. i would always think why my life is so boring and all. but then at times, i would wish for my life to be simpler, much simpler. i would wish that the whole of RJ would only consist of me and my close friends. hehe. that would be so awesome.
oh, i really really intend to delete some "friends" on FB. they are just mere acquaintances. people whom you do not even say hi or bye to in real life. when i first started having FB, my aim was to see my friend count increase. but i realised there is no point in that. friends who will stay by you and all are only those minute few. :))) and i am really glad for those people to exist in my life. yay. yeah, so i am deleting those that i am not close to SOON, SOON! hahhaha.

going out tmrw with wenyi and carissa. :))) HAPPINESS. :)))) i love my friends just the way they are. :DDDDD

shit. i realise i am becoming very incoherent these days.

on another note, i heard from xinle that there is a rumour that RI only has 53% A for PW this year. it had better not be true. :((( i really really want my A. i worked so hard for PW and practically slogged my way through. >.< RAWWWRRRRR....

CA juniors are a really enthusiastic and funny lot. :))) hehehe. yay. CA camp was damn funny and fotrot was just too awesome. i love the people in there. :))) YAY.

2011-03-31T20:33:00.000+08:00

i have had enough of this. please stop comparing me with my friends. yes, they are smart, they are hardworking i concede and i will always be that stupid loser in your eyes, who will NEVER EVER live up to your expectations. you ALWAYS compare me to my friends but whenever i ask you why my friend can have this and why can't i, you always ask me NOT TO COMPARE. it is ironic, is it not? that you are not practising what you preach. it disgusts and annoys me because you are not setting a good example yourself. i know, i can sense your disappointment in me and i try very hard to better myself each time. but somehow the results just do not show. i have not done well this semester and you just scolded me again. can you, for once, look at the EFFORT that i have put in for the test and not the end result. yes, i admit the end result is important, but can you please LOOK CLEARLY at the number of nights i stay up late just to study. no, you will NEVER appreciate the hard work i put in because all that matters to you is my results. then, you start comparing me to my sisters as if comparing me to my friends isn't bad enough. my sisters are way smarter than i am, i know that, i acknowledge that, but do you have to rub it in? because YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND ME. :( and i appear as though i am indifferent about the results i get in front of you. because i don't want you to see that i am tearing inside. tearing because i too am disappointed in myself. i bet you will NEVER realise that! i know this year is a crucial year for me and i am willing to put in my 101% best effort to ace the a-levels. but please, i really really need your support and all. for a start, PLEASE STOP COMPARING. I BEG YOU. because it makes me feel inferior.

2011-03-29T23:01:00.002+08:00

for now, i can only cross my fingers and pray. :( i really don't want to fail chem. i have put in so much effort for this chem CT paper. :(( half the class failed. oh man.

my dieting plan has not yet materialised and it will never in the near future. BAD. no self-control. eeks. :(((

i wanna get onto the dean's list again. EEEEEESHHHHH!!!!!! :)))))

2011-03-21T19:48:00.000+08:00

studying for math CTs is greatly annoying. omg. i cannot do many questions and i could feel my brain burn. like LITERALLY. i felt this strong wave of heat in my head and it certainly affected by thinking. damn stress. MATH O MATH! :(((

whatever. 3 more to go. LET'S GO!

2011-03-19T23:06:00.001+08:00

1) I NEED TO SELF-REGULATE.

2) I NEED TO FOCUS.

3) I NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT!!!!

'nough said. all empty talk so far. :(

2011-03-17T09:47:00.002+08:00

i have decided that should i get into medicine in NUS (i pray hard i do), i will join Doctors Without Borders for a couple of years after i graduate. and no, it is not a reckless decision. I think it would be meaningful to help both the people in Singapore as well as those overseas. :)) i am so so so excited about the thought. hehe. :D to effect positive change into people's lives, YES I WILL!!!

I sincerely pray and wish for the best for the people in Japan :( I admire the 50 Japanese who risked their lives and volunteered to mointor the last nuclear plant for the sake of the people there. Unsung heroes. :) their selflessness is unparalleled. :)

2011-03-14T22:30:00.002+08:00

'cause i was so wrong. so wrong.

i don't have the mugging mood now. THIS IS BAD. i cannot finish revising. my tooth is aching. i don't why either. it hurts till my head is aching too. :((

uncomfortable feeling. never mind, i have MANGOES to make me happy. the only thing is that whenever i eat, it hurts :( haha. oh wells. shall scoot off now~

2011-03-12T21:03:00.002+08:00

some people just piss me off BIG TIME.
GET. A. LIFE. and stop being so ANAL.

wishing for a fairytale to happen.

2011-03-11T19:42:00.001+08:00

& now i have learnt to harden my heart
no longer will i ever be the same.
when hope turned into despair,
this is my only salvation.

2011-03-10T20:33:00.003+08:00

i feel the need to rant here now.
today i saw A at the canteen today and he asked me why i have not been going to our OG table. i told him my reason. he then asked me if i will be going to dramafest with our OG. i said no because i have CCA (DS). then A told me our OG doesn't really care about me going anymore. like seriously?!?! i was like WTH?!?! if you guys don't care about whether or not i go to our OG table, please STOP ASKING ME TO GO THERE EVERY MORNING. my gosh. and to think i feel guilty everyday for not going to my OG table. -.- i feel betrayed. seriously. but then again, maybe A is lying because A loves spouting rubbish so i am not sure if he is telling the truth. i cannot even finish my homework at hand and try to complete as much as i can every morning. that was the reason i chose not to our OG table. you guys (OG friends) told me i could always do my work at the table. but seriously, think about it, if you are talking to your friends and laughing all the while, will you ever get things done? i really need time to complete my work and all. I have been failing ALL my tests so far, from GP to econs. really all and i am not exaggerating. i have deteriorated much from last year and i need time to pick myself up. yes, you guys are one hell of a genius but i need time to complete my work and revise okay! can you guys at least spare a thought for me! this is our A-level year and i certainly do not want to receive my grades back and cry.
furthermore, it is not only me who does not go to the table anymore. B and many of our other OG mates do not go there anymore, but why are you guys placing SO MUCH EMPHASIS on me going there and not others? then when you guys see me in school, you guys scold me for not going. i feel apologetic but i feel tired explaining my reason to you. because my reason will always be the same. i need time to study. and you guys will always think it is a lame excuse. seriously, this is affecting me because i do love our OG still. :(
i will go back to our OG table after the CTs so please stop bugging me alright? it sucks.
it is not as though you guys will be reading this but i just need to get this out.

and i cannot cope in school. the amount of work thrown upon me is overwhelming. CTs are coming and i have little time to revise. :(
BAD WEEK. BAD FEELING. FML.

you make my heart stir.

2011-03-09T22:37:00.002+08:00

my fringe sucks like mad now :( ME LOOKING SO TOOT NOW. ME ISH VERY VERY SAD. :'(( hahaha.
gp exam today was horrible. i will fail for sure. :( couldn't think of ways to remedy it during the test. :( boo. life sucks.

i could really use a wish right now.

2011-03-04T23:28:00.002+08:00

it's always the race against time. :( bad. i can NEVER clear my backlog nor start my revision at this rate. the more i clear, the more teachers have to add on to that pile that is threatening to engulf and drown me. :( sigh. i have yet managed to find time to revise for my CTs which are starting next week. bad time management. i really need more organisation in my life.

my life is boring. period.
i want my life to be HAPPENING :DDDD maybe it will be after CTs.

now, back to bio. back to my mundane life. :(

2011-02-27T16:07:00.002+08:00

i am greatly appalled when i read that children in China were rented out or even sold by their parents to go beg on the streets. either that or they were sold to syndicates and they were treated as money-generating machines. :( should these children refuse to comply to the demands the syndicates have requested, they were tortured with their tongues, lips, ears cut. seriously? what is wrong with these people? their perverse actions are greatly disturbing. seriously. what the hell is wrong with them?
firstly, the parents are at fault. some parents feel their children are a burden to them. therefore, they sold them off to these syndicates just so they could get money. excuse me! children are NOT goods that can be traded or sold. they are humans after all and they deserve all respect they ought to get. if having children is a burden, why bother giving birth to them in the first place? these parents should be jailed or something. seriously. these parents need to be educated. why do such parents exist?
then worse still, the syndicates. MONEY-GRABBERS. MONEY-FACED. they should be eliminated from the face of earth. RAWWWRRRR..... stupid people. can't you guys get a proper job and earn proper money instead of doing so at the expense of the children's suffering? woah seriously.
these cases are not just limited to China. It is happening everywhere in the world. too much injustice in the world. seriously.
CHILD TRAFFICKING SHOULD BE BANNED AND CONDONED.

shi tian

2011-02-26T23:12:00.002+08:00

sometimes things just don't happen the way you want it to. no matter how hard you pray and how much effort you put into things, things don't occur the way you want it to. it sucks mad because i have to wear a smile despite knowing i am disappointed inside. terribly disappointed in myself. i have to wear a smile, trying to convince myself it is alright. but who am i trying to bluff? everyone can tell it is a facade. friends shower their concerns and i really appreciate that. but sometimes, these concerns actually cut even deeper because i tend to compare myself to them. we all put in the same amount of effort, why is it that i cannot be recognised for my efforts? i really really am tired. tired of failures. every time i pick myself up, i tell myself never mind, i will treat it as a lesson learnt. but now, i am bruised all over from head to toe, testament to the numerous failures i have dealt with. i cannot afford to fall anymore. people ought to see more beneath the surface. i have said this many times, my optimism is a facade. no one has managed to see through that still.
it will be better tomorrow. how many times can i say this to myself, i shall count. i am still waiting for the day i can proudly say i have recovered from my "injuries".

i am disintegrating. :(

2011-02-25T17:46:00.003+08:00

we will NEVER change to be angels for you. you labeled us devils, and worse still BUMMERS as though you are the ONLY one that is normal. please. just cut the pretense, seriously. if you really hate all of us, then why bother acting nice in front of us, and worse still, act CUTE in front of us it is revolting? i do not like FAKE people. if you are unhappy about us, be open about it and tell us instead of labeling us names which we think SUITS YOU MORE. people warned me about you even before i knew our class but i chose to ignore these comments because i thought i shouldn't judge you based on other people's opinions of you. but i was wrong. how right can my friends be about you. seriously.
seriously, i hope you can change to be a better person otherwise you don't deserve the sympathy i am giving you. maybe you should for one, stop labeling others.
angels or demons will never exist unless you perceive them to. seriously. GET A LIFE or get out of our lives. i don't want to leave JC hating anybody. hatred begets hatred. :(

biomedical symposium tomorrow. mad scary. intense cramming now. sheesh. i hope everyone in our group will get a medal. YAY. :DDDDDD

shi tian

shi tian

2011-02-24T22:33:00.002+08:00

life's hectic. really hectic. :(
biomedical symposium this coming sunday. omg. i really hope i won't pull down my team. :( seriously. i am like the least knowledgeable one there and i feel really inferior. everyone is desperately trying to cram knowledge and facts into their head, hoping against hope some of these information will get retained. but as for me, ... hahaha. NOTHING GETS IN. 'nough said. i will just try my best that day. MEGA EXCITED ABOUT THE WHOLE EVENT. :))))) YAY. :)) after the event, i have mega lots of catching up to do. too much backlog. BAD. :( i haven't revised for CTs yet. spells trouble huh. sheesh. :((( okay okay.

shi tian

2011-02-18T23:57:00.001+08:00

blinded by prejudice. maybe i should not be so judgemental. hmmm... will i be proved wrong? i sincerely hope so.

2011-02-13T21:59:00.003+08:00

:)))
i am really really excited for the biomedical thingy. hehe. i know i have said this countless of times but yeah, i really am. i feel fortunate to be part of this whole great experience. it really is DAMN fascinating knowing more about how the body works, anatomy, pathology etc. :) my group is very friendly and that makes things even better :)))
though the readings are intimidating (in terms of amount), i still look forward to reading it all (however at the expense of my schoolwork).

on another note, this morning i was emo-ing and was thinking really hard. what if i really cannot get into medicine? my mother advised me to take on other internships besides the medical ones just in case i cannot get into it. she wanted me to join law firms for interships. but my answer was an ADAMANT no. i really am only interested in medicine and i know law is never the thing for me. but i am fearful because i don't have a backup plan. i need a direction in my life. i am more inclined to the sciences. this year is gonna past so fast and i will have to make these deicisions quickly. i hope i will find a way out soon otherwise i will have to pray extremely hard that i can get into medicine. :))) i really want to. it will be an awesome experience. :DDDD

take 5 was DAMN boring. i am sorry for those who had planned it but i don't really like such events. last year was less boring because at least i played with my beloved OG. this year, i just walk around aimlessly with my classmates. :) bad :( we kept looking at our watches to see when the event will end. it seemed like an eternity. :(

next week will be an extremely taxing week. i need to buck up.
note to myself: I MUST NEVER NEGLECT MY SCHOOLWORK. A-LEVELS IS NEARING. I NEED TO CONQUER IT.
tomorrow is valentine's day. for couples out there, HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY.
shi tian

2011-02-10T22:45:00.002+08:00

what is wrong with me? seriously?
it is not as though i am not working hard! why aren't the results showing? it is terribly demoralising to get back my grades (close to failure or even fail).
terribly disappointed in myself. really. i am tired. tired of telling myself to give myself another chance to prove myself wrong.

i detest myself. no one will understand that. people always have the impression i am smart and all but seriously, do they even know my grades? failing!!! yes, failing is part of life but CONSTANT and CONSISTENT failing. that sucks mad. it degrades my self-esteem. i have nothing to say. i have been reflecting quite a lot these days to see how i can improve.

please show me a way out. :(

shi tian

2011-02-05T14:04:00.005+08:00

in the end, i still succumbed to temptation and relished the goodies placed in front of me. what's worse is that once i start, i cannot stop. hahha. DAYUUUMMMM :((( tummy is showing more ostensibly than ever! shheeessssh!
gonna watch HOMECOMING with my family tonight. jack neo's new movie. it had better be interesting or else..... i will blame my younger sister >:((((

the fact that i am J2 this year has not sunk in yet. maybe i am deluding myself. :P

shi tian

()___()
I . _ . I
() ()
()___() ==> DOES IT LOOK LIKE A RABBIT? :))))

2011-02-02T23:02:00.002+08:00

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!
actually, i don't really feel the mood this year. it came too quickly. :) and then POOF, it will soon be gone in a flash.
chinese new year has always been my favourite festival of the year and it will continue to be. the delicious snacks for me to feast on (think BAK KWA, PINEAPPLE TARTS, REUNION DINNER) woohoo, they keep me salivating.
of course, i have to constantly remind myself to not indulge in too much of such stuff because it is unhealthy.

oh, i was doing research for the biomedical challenge and it was a really gratifying experience. initially, i was taken aback by the sheer amount of knowledge i had to know and the medical jargon that was presented before me simply overwhelmed me. however, after digesting the information that i read, it was a really rewarding experience. i really loved what i was reading. the more i read, my quest for knowledge grew. hahaha. this is certainly not an overstatement. knowing more about the human body was simply enlightening and breathtaking. hehehe. i am not sure of where i need to learn to. the amount of knowledge out there is endless. :)))) there will be lectures prepared for us. cannot wait to attend it. omg. i think i am crazy but i wanna satisfy this craving FASTTTTT :))))
i will move on to reading and researching about the gastrointestinal system tomorrow :) exciting much :D i really really hope the biomedical challenge will be an eye-opener. :)

on another note, i really regret not signing up to be an ogl. sigh. my FB is being spammed by many many orientation pictures. pretty annoying >:(

gonna SHOU SUI tonight. hahaha. :D :D :D

once again, HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!

i am so glad no one reads my blog. i like it that way :))

shi tian

2011-01-29T16:52:00.002+08:00

omg, i am on the verge of going BERSEK! my gosh, thousands of math sums to do and i cannot complete them. ARRRGHHHHH....RAWRRRRR....
and to add on to that, i still have to try comprehend the gross anatomy of the cardiovascular and gastrointestinal system of the human body. TRUST ME, i have 0 idea about them because i did not take the o-levels that my JAE friends did and they did cover that for their o-levels. RP left those topics out because they are not tested in the A-levels. OMG. i am trying to struggle to stay afloat. :''''( HELP, HELP and HELP. hahhahahaha.
that is why i chose to take a break from my work to regain my sanity.

i went for the SOT lecture yesterday. hmmm... i always have the same feeling after attending it. SOT does not help in my GP (content) but it is always a very inspiring lecture that allows me to view things from another perspective. interesting perspectives i have never considered before. :) nice :)

gosh, i hope my brain capacity can increase. i really need to understand what i am reading (anatomy thingy.)

shi tian

crazier, crazier, crazier

2011-01-23T00:34:00.002+08:00

this is a choice i have made and i am in absolutely no position to regret it :( will i get rewarded for my efforts? hmm... my life is a monotony, a humdrum experience! never mind, one more year to endure and i will have the last laugh. instead of envying people, i shall work even harder to have the last laugh. :))))
that aside, i am BALLOONING. no one seems to believe me. hahhaha. my stomach is BULGING. BOOMXZXZXX.
ooohhh, i think the girls in my class are getting closer. YAY. i love it that way :) a bonded class. :D

if problems can be solved, why worry?
if problems cannot be solved, why worry?

saw these two lines in someone else's blog. if one thinks superficially, then that individual would be inclined to agree with the argument presented. however, delving deeper into the issue, i realised it is not so much about worrying about the problem but rather the repercussions that are tagged on together with these problems. people fear the after effects more than the problem itself (i think). hmmm...

J2 THIS YEAR.
NOTE TO SELF: WORK HARD AND WORK EVEN HARDER. :D have faith in yourself!

shi tian

2011-01-20T22:45:00.001+08:00

oh dear oh dear, i am losing the momentum :( this is BAD.
i really hope i get selected to attend the symposium >.<

shi tian

2011-01-18T22:42:00.002+08:00

maybe stress is what i need to keep myself motivated. i feel i am more productive this way. this makes me happy. stress makes me realise the importance of time management and i tend to do my work more efficiently. i am happy. :) march on! :D :D :D

what can't kill you makes you stronger!

shi tian

2011-01-18T20:01:00.002+08:00

so far, j2 life has been rather harsh for me. my workload is piling up and my stress level is accelerating. there are simply too many things that i have to do. :( cca stuff, isle, workload. this year, i promise myself to work doubly hard and i am really going to push myself very hard, even if that means burning myself out. it is really draining. things will start to get worse. luckily, i have my classmates to keep me sane. >.<

please please help me through this. ahhhh!

shi tian

2011-01-05T18:36:00.002+08:00

never underestimate others,
never overestimate yourself.
this shall be my mantra for the year. :)

on a sidenote, i have a newfound respect for a particular person. it made me see her in a different light. the dogged and unflinching determination she has, i must salute to her. :)

shi tian

2011-01-04T10:29:00.002+08:00

my wishes for the new year. :D

1. To be happy and laugh more.
2. Family members are always happy and healthy.
3. Friends to be happy too.
4. Make more new friends and widen my social circle.
5. To live my remaining JC life without regrets and just enjoy myself.
6. To work extremely hard for the A-levels and the prelims as well as other school tests.
7. TO ACE ANY EXAMINATIONS THAT I AM TAKING.
8. to get onto the dean's list again.
9. change the way i speak (to appear more friendly).
10. be contented with what i have in life and not ask for more.
11. appreciate the people around me for who they are instead of nitpicking on their flaws.
12. not to procrastinate
13. join as many things as possible e.g. forums to expose myself to new things
14. exercise more to remain fit
15. To improve my English
16. to get scholarships :D

shi tian

2010-12-23T23:26:00.002+08:00

chanced upon my senior's blog just now. it made me think a bit.
we are constantly told to dream big, dare to dream and even pursue our dream. however, there are times when there are constraints to one pursuing one's dream. tangible things that constraint an individual from realising one's potential. in my senior's case, it is money. she was offered a place in an overseas university but because her parents could not afford an overseas education for her, she has to give up her dreams. this made me think. is life fair? are the chances in life so exclusive to only those who can afford it? how then can one realise one's potential fully without having to take into consideration these constraints? true, you may say there are always organisations offering scholarships! but, ask yourself, how many people are truly competent enough to get hold of these scholarships? what about those who are not so academically inclined? life is not fair, is it? if that is so, that motivation is there for one to work so hard in the hope of achieving his goal when he knows it is a futile attempt? should i then work so so so hard even though i know i am not competent enough to attain a scholarship? what is the point? i am so confused. :((( hmmm...

shi tian

2010-12-19T00:38:00.002+08:00

there is something about the way I speak that people disapprove of. I seem to appear aloof, snobbish and arrogant (i was told!!!) to others because of the way I speak and how I carry myself. I was told it could deny me opportunities in the future. :O
I guess I will try to change. It will be tough but I am willing to try. Just so that opportunities will come knocking to me. :)

2010-12-16T15:58:00.002+08:00

sometimes, things are just not meant to be.
i can only pray that for every door closed, another will open.
sheer incompetence. i hate myself. :(
how now? i am ambivalent of my future. sigh :( my dreams and reality always seem to be contrasting. what i want will never be. why then am i working so hard if it is not within my reach?
pausing to reflect, did i even work hard to begin with? seeing my sister's friends going to their dream universities, i can only look on in envy.

how do i find the strength to persevere?
how do i keep myself from falling?
from now till then, i can only tell myself, maybe tomorrow will be better :(

2010-12-14T21:44:00.002+08:00

I happened to chance upon someone's blog and dare I say it really inspired me. It inspired me to work harder to improve my linguistic ability and to work even harder for my J2 year. All along, I have been under the impression that the Chinese scholars are less proficient than us in English but this girl's blog just proved me wrong. It made me feel guilty, as a Singaporean. English, to her, isn't even her Mother Tongue. Yet, she managed to master the language well (at least better than I do). It hit me quite hard and made me feel guilty. I know how weak my linguistic ability is and have been lamenting about it since FOREVER!!! Yet, I always procrastinate and choose not to do anything about it. Time and tide waits for no man. I shall not waste any more time. I need to work harder to improve myself. I need to be DILIGENT. NO MORE PROCRASTINATION.
That shall be my NEW YEAR RESOLUTION. :D

shi tian

2010-11-27T18:47:00.000+08:00

awkward...awkward... :I
what should i do?

2010-11-21T21:49:00.002+08:00

sorry, but i hate superficial friendships.
i am not sure how long this will last. it is as though we are both are precariously walking on this thin thread and should any force come our way (conflicts for that matter), our friendship will be gone. ironically, i still treasure this friendship (because it was not superficial in the past). tell you what, i will play your game. i don't believe this will last forever.

我想要学会自我催眠痛觉会少一些
潜意识作祟想著想到失眠

我渐渐的自我催眠却回不到从前

shi tian

2010-11-02T23:22:00.003+08:00

sometimes i feel i should be accorded the respect i rightfully deserve (even from my close friends). maybe, that is why we are close friends but not the closest.

how superficial relationships are, aren't they? prove me wrong.

jc1 just flew past like that. :((( gonna be a J2 soon :( i am struggling to make sense of my lecture notes.

i just want to lead a happy life. :)

shi tian

2010-10-30T22:01:00.002+08:00

hello there again :)

i had isle meeting today. we had to plan our stuff this time. time flies. in less than a month, i will be going to wengding village in cangyuan to help the villagers build a water filtration system so they will have access to clean water. :) it will be an extremely meaningful trip for me. i am very very very excited because it is my first school trip overseas and it will be damn meaningful. i love our team - the camaraderie we have established thus far. it is simply awesome.

my class is still not bonded. there is this huge huge apparent segregation in class. it sucks. the two groups do talk to each other but somehow both feel awkward around each other. sheesh.

maybe for a start, i should STOP comparing. it makes me feel inferior (in terms of grades, i meant). seriously. everyone around me is doing so well and i feel pressured to live up to the expectations that has been laid upon me. somehow. my biology teacher expressed his disappointment in my grades this time. sucks man. :(((

tomorrow will be a better day (or so i hope). i shall continue to be an optimist. i love being happy and laugh all day long. it is a wonderful feeling. it is nice to bring joy to those around you as well. i love that feeling. :)
"Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself."

btw, thanks angela. :)

shi tian

2010-10-26T00:09:00.002+08:00

'cause when i say my grades are mediocre, no one believes that. it sucks. no one but i can understand how disappointing my grades are. no matter how had i try, i don't get the grades i hope to achieve. why? :((

it's great no one knows about my blog except a select few. i can rant all i want here. not that anybody cares.

time for self-improvement.
maybe it's complacency. *shrugs*

shi tian

2010-10-25T00:26:00.003+08:00

getting back promo results tomorrow. wish me luck man :)
i really really want my grades to improve from mid-year. :) i shall pray hard :D
going for isle injection tomorrow. oh dear. it will hurt a lot. i think i will cry haha.

hmmm... it has been one year since i have entered rjc. i prefer rgs to rjc. the friendships forged in rgs were much stronger and i feel closer to the people in rgs. i don't know.

ah, pimple outbreak. SHEESH. i went shopping today and got a totally CHIO pair of sandals. yay. :)

and i can feel we are drifting apart. maybe it is just me :(

shi tian

2010-09-10T23:38:00.002+08:00

hey, promos are round the corner :O i am filled with apprehension. i am not sure if i can finish revising. it is very very taxing. hmmm...

not sure when it will be the next time i blog :) teehee. i don't really like blogging. sheesh.

everything will be better after week 4, or so i hope. :)
till then! good luck!

no one comes here anyway :D

p.s.: I AM GETTING FATTER. DAYUUUMMMM.... :( i am trying to slim down.
p.p.s: i am gaining lots of muscles instead. is that something to be happy about?

currently listening to something more by secondhand serenade. NAISE (Y)

shi tian

2010-06-19T12:34:00.002+08:00

wanna shy away from the world and be a recluse. i don't know why either. just a sudden thought. :/

cts are in a week's time. apprehensive.

2010-02-15T22:39:00.001+08:00

FOR GOODNESS SAKE, PLEASE STOP IT!
IT IS FREAKING IRRITATING!

seriously.

2010-02-13T10:55:00.001+08:00

stop being so anal, I NEED A LIFE TOO!
you are breathing down too hard on me, it is suffocating!
i live the way i want it.

on another note, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR! :)

love,
shi tian

2010-01-28T20:52:00.002+08:00

damn freaking tired after the 1st day of orientation. MY LEGS ARE ACHING LIKE MAD.
nonetheless, it was quite fun!!! :)

love,
shi tian

2010-01-23T12:54:00.003+08:00

AHHHH!!!!
after seeing KARA's photoshoot, i also wanna have a photoshoot of my own, holding balloons and wearing nice dresses! look at them below!!!! :O
SO EXCITING!!! WOAH!!! *fantasize* *fantasize*.
tsk. it will not happen please!!!! :((((((((((

i am gonna go for a photoshoot someday, this shall be a promise i make to myself. SO EXCITING!!! how enthralling the thought!!!
AWESOME!!!

bye bye!!!! :)

orientation coming soon :((((((((((((((((((((((( i don't know anyone in my group. sad TTM. i hope i can make new friends soon. :))

love,
shi tian

2010-01-20T19:55:00.002+08:00

just came back from an elective: the FOSL one that lasted 8 HOURS!!!!
it was so draining that by the time i got home, i immediately bathed and went to bed. :((((((((
the guys in the class were quite funny but overall it was major boring. but at the least, we still talked amongst us a lot. :))))))

love,
shi tian

2010-01-12T22:08:00.001+08:00

I HAVE NOT GOT CALLED YET.
THEY BETTER CALL ME!!! :(
I WANNA BE IN AMELIA AND SHI TING'S GROUP!!!
:DDDDd
please let me be in there!!!

love,
shi tian

2010-01-11T10:37:00.002+08:00

i am starting to feel the tension setting in and it is accumulating by the minute!
my face is flushed and my hands cold. my heartbeat is resonating within me. for now, i can only pray fervently and hope for the best.
I MUST BELIEVE IN MYSELF! YES I CAN!
i do not want to disappoint anyone, including myself yet again!
may the force be with me! :D

love,
shi tian

2010-01-09T22:41:00.002+08:00

i cried so much yesterday :(

my life is boring. i need to spice up my life instantly. :D

i really hope induction and orientation would be fun :D (or at least not boring!!!)

2010-01-06T17:53:00.001+08:00

woah!!!
i so totally do not know that o-level results will be released this coming MONDAY, on the 11th.
it seems just like yesterday when we just took the test!!!
now, waiting in apprehension!
i hope i will do well and get an A!!! :S

school is starting soon and i think it will suck! :(

love,
shi tian

2010-01-05T21:43:00.002+08:00

just came back from class chalet!
AND THE BBQ WAS AWESOME TO THE MAX MAN!!!
the food was good, especially the BBQ stingray. people were like fighting for it!!!!
I FINALLY LEARN HOW TO PLAY BRIDGE, by just observing yutan for one round. I FEEL SO ACCOMPLISHED AND HAPPY.
i won lots of times and i INSIST it is NOT beginner's luck!

first day of the chalet was sucky and boring but the second day made up for it TOTALLY. damn fun and good food. :D gossip a little :D loving it.

I LOVE 404 TO THE MAX. I LOVE BBQ STINGRAY TO THE MAX! haha.

love,
shi tian

2010-01-03T20:07:00.002+08:00

you will never know the real me.

2010-01-03T19:00:00.000+08:00

I JUST CUT MY HAIR. I FEEL HIDEOUS!!!
DON'T FEEL LIKE GOING TO THE CLASS CHALET ANYMORE BECAUSE OF THIS HIDEOUS HAIR!!!

HIDEOUS! :(((

love,
shi tian

2010-01-02T22:37:00.002+08:00

this morning i tried using the blackhead remover, AND IT TOTALLY DID NOT WORK!!!
i am so upset!!!
and i have grown so much fatter during the hols simply because i have not been exercising and i am eating junk food since forever!!!
this blob of fat is now hanging off my tummy!!! BLOB BLOB BLOB.

class chalet on monday. DILEMMA! i need more gossip. it makes my life interesting!!! i found out who ____'s BF is!!!!

i am cutting my hair soon!!! i hope it will not be a disaster!!!

love,
shi tian

2009-12-23T18:28:00.003+08:00

maybe i did something wrong... :( please tell me what i did wrongly :(

oh on the other hand, i bought my school bag today. i am contented because the school bag is really nice in my opinion. YIPPEE.... :D
bought school shoes too a few weeks before. :D YIPPEEE!
now, i am ready to go to school. :D
kidding, i am so not looking forward to JC life. boo!

shopping today was great. :D
saw this really nice purple dress :D but both my sisters said the price was not worth how the dress look so i did not buy it. :( the next time i go to the same shop, if i see it, i shall buy it because it means the dress and i are fated. hehe :D

bought my family members christmas pressies already. :D yipppeeee.... :D

love,
shi tian

2009-12-06T00:04:00.002+08:00

hello :D
just took my H1N1 jab today.OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH..... it hurts so much! i almost cried when the doctor stuck the thing thing in me. OUCH!
heh heh. :D
came back from my malaysia trip. yay. it was fun :D we went to 2 amusement parks and did lots of shopping. :D
i love amusement parks. yipppeeee. i sound like a contented little girl and i am. that's all. :D

watched a few dramas lately. totally worth my time man :D

love,
shi tian

2009-11-23T19:38:00.001+08:00

you know what, i think you are just being so anal about it. :(

2009-11-07T22:50:00.003+08:00

i suddenly feel this tinge of sadness. :( i feel sad to leave RGS as well as my friends. they have given me such wonderful memories and it is a nostalgic feeling :D the laughters we have shared and all. every ending marks a new beginning but then again, can i wish for things not to end? 404 and RGAK have given me so much memorable experiences and so many wonderful and weird friends i have to thank. 404 is the best class i have ever had and can wish for.
well, it is sad that i cannot go for the RGAK farewell :(

O's is coming. 2 more days excluding that very day. :( i hope xinle can organise some outing soon. :D

love,
shi tian

2009-10-30T21:52:00.002+08:00

realisation has not yet set in. is it too late? am i overconfident? did i overestimate myself? reality has not yet dawned on me somehow, which is obviously bad :( my chinese was never good to start with)
up till this point in time, i can only cross my fingers and pray that i will do well for chinese o's. relentless mugging and memorising is gross. :( urgh, but i will trudge on and pray my 9 days before the test will be well spent.

till then! :D

love,
shi tian

2009-10-19T12:15:00.002+08:00

heyo :D
i am very angry with myself.
i wanted to go for class outing so badly and end up i overslept and could not go for it. i was so excited, i got my sunblock, my extra clothes and everything all ready just so i could attend this awesome class gathering. i want to be involved in the amazing race thingy. it sounds so fun and of course the welfare comm. planned so much for this :D
well, i can only blame myself for being too excited that i kept tossing and turning in bed the whole night and could not get to sleep. and when i could, i overslept. -.-
SENTOSA sounds awesome! never mind.
haha. valerie called my handphone just now and asked me whether or not i was going. so hilarious. she claimed i told her to wear class shirt and now she is the only person who wore class shirt there. i think this is so funny because i don't remember asking her to do so.
tuition later :D meeting janine at the mrt. :D
hoho
now, i am left with looking at the pictures on facebook for class outing instead of being physically involved.
hoho. options field trip is to fly kite at marina barrage this saturday.... wheeeeeeeee...... i specially bought a hello kitty kite just for this event. i feel childish :D
we are also having a picnic. it will be so fun. hopefully it won't rain. picnic will be fun with janine, li khee and chiam :D
hohoohohho. and i bought my FAM dress already. yippeeee

hoho. gotta organise batch outing. i hope it will work out well :D

i don't want to enter JC because these wonderful moments will be gone :( awwwwww.... i love 404 to the max. :D hopefully, i can go for the next class outing :D

love,
shi tian

2009-10-02T20:58:00.003+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHIAM!
thanks for being such a nice nice nice friend. :D <3

love,
shi tian

2009-10-01T16:46:00.003+08:00

hey,
i did not go for the philo assessment today :(
i had a headache and that was the reason why i slept at 10.30 last night. i had 9.5 hours of sleep and my headache was obviously gone. :D oh, i have an ulcer in my mouth too, which hurts terribly. i guess i am very susceptible to having ulcers.

actually, the main reason for me not attending the philo assessment is because my eczema came back to haunt me. :( it was terribly itchy and uncomfortable. mine grows on the hand and feet and it is blister-like. :O but it was not as serious as what i had in secondary one. during that time, my hands and feet were peeling badly. anyway, though not as serious, it was still very very uncomfortable.got these two pictures from the internet. this is the type of eczema i am having. :( totally gross, itchy and painful. of course, those are not from my own hands and feet!
i have the medication for my eczema so i did not go to the doctor. but, i am not sure of the right assessment procedure if one is absent from the assessment. i am gonna produce an excuse letter. wonder if that is enough!
shall upload the photos xinle has been pestering me for eons on FB tonight most probably. :D

love,
shi tian

2009-09-30T19:48:00.001+08:00

hoho :D
i feel apologetic to xinle because i pangseh-ed her after i promised i would go for the angklung phototaking :D sorry dude! :D

oh, i just remembered xinle still owes me a treat. *hint hint*

oh, i just realised ____ can be so crafty too. lol. maybe i am reading too much into it! :)

love,
shi tian

2009-09-29T19:38:00.001+08:00

tired to the max because of options. there is much more homework now! ironical, is it not?

love,
shi tian

2009-09-26T22:14:00.003+08:00

oh deary me!
life is mundane to the max. i feel this wave of boredom overwhelming me and my every single moment is spent on chinese. this is bad. not that my chinese is improving (at least i don't know). i do hope my chinese my chinese will miraculously improve and become like li khee's standard. highly impossible, yeah i think i aim too high!

anyway, my mouth is burning because i ate something SPICY! haha. we had four female crabs for dinner which i love because i love eating the eggs!:) yummmmy! crabby.... should not eat too much the next time if not i will turn crappy right?

i want to shop. bored stiff. oh deary deary me! bb then. there is GP option on Monday. sucks! :P

love,
shi tian

2009-09-24T22:21:00.002+08:00

hello folks.
is this my first time posting after the EYAs? lalalala. oh my options are boring but luckily i have janine and li khee to accompany me for the physics for flight course which makes it all the more interesting and entertaining. furthermore, we have mr thio as our teacher, which is totally cool and hilarious. sigh. i don't know anyone from my GP option so it makes it BORING. hey hey!
netball carn is next saturday, i am so excited.

my impression of someone has changed ( for the worse). i didn't know she is such a person :O

love,
shi tian :D

2009-09-20T18:45:00.003+08:00

hello :D

i have just seen the class page that li khee did for the class. i have no complaints since i did not help out because i do not have adobe but i was rather sad because the photo i sent to her was not used. she KOPED another of my photo from facebook and used it :O i did not look nice in there because my face looked so round but never mind, i shall just leave it status quo because it would mean more work for her. looking at everyone's faces, i thought it was super hilarious. let me show you the photo i sent to her though the photo i sent to her had my face cropped out. oh, i did add some embellishments on my own for the original photo :D lalalala.
nice right? if this face was used in the yearbook, i will be very pleased. but li khee has worked very very very hard so thumbs up for her man!

xinle, can you hurry organise the outing or something! goodness, i am so excited for it!

love,
shi tian

2009-09-19T00:45:00.001+08:00

XINLE WANTS ME TO POST ABOUT HER BECAUSE SHE THINKS SHE IS GREAT. i beg to differ. goodbye!!!

love,
shi tian

2009-09-12T01:18:00.002+08:00

went to moodle early this morning and i saw this message by nina! -.-

in case you cannot see it, she typed: Good morning SHITIAN! I hope you didn't miss me too much too much during the holidays.

lol. she typed it at like 7.45am. lols.

shi tian

2009-09-08T15:34:00.002+08:00

i went to revisit the math questions that i once could not solve.
now that i am to do it, a feel an immense sense of satisfaction :D
i like it like this!
i hope i can solve every single math questions in the test! :D

PEEKABOO! this is the first hint i am dropping if she does visit my blog. i know she doesn't so i shall say it to her after EYAs together with charlotte! :D

love,
shi tian

2009-09-06T17:26:00.001+08:00

i didn't know you need to have a warrant to kill wolves. :D cool :D

i hope abigail will be very very nice and change her option course with xinle! :D

shi tian

2009-08-15T22:48:00.002+08:00

hey all :D
haha. i am going to keep a distance from facebook until T4W1 is over. I have asked my mother to help change my password and not let me know until i ask her for it when T4W1 is over :D lol. a few days back, i deactivated my account but i realised it is too easy for me to re-activate it since i just need my old password. therefore, i think deactivating is STUPID! haha. now that i do not have my password to facebook, i cannot access it but i i still receive updates through my email though. lol. through my email, i saw that xinle posted a message on my wall saying charlotte has deactivated her account. lols. i changed my password before she deactivated. haha. so sorry xinle i cannot reply any of your message!
i think this will do me good. i can concentrate on my work better. :D awesome! oh i realise i am getting fatter again! so lose weight! it seems the dieting plan is not working! :(

eyas are coming and i have not revised for ANYTHING! this is bad! let's activate the MUGGER mode! :)
*switch on* yay! lalala. bb. i wanna go watch some tv now! :D

<3 shi tian

2009-08-08T23:31:00.002+08:00

saw this thing online that lets you edit photos and poof this came out! cool right?

love,
shi tian

2009-08-08T22:49:00.002+08:00

yo yo i am updating finally! :)
oh oh rgs celebrated the national day thing thing like yesterday. i was one of the narrators for 404 since janine did not want to do it alone. IT WAS A HORRID EXPERIENCE! when it was up there, i was shaking in my shoes (literally), and my hands kept trembling! :( i had to act enthu too, it was scary and i promise never to do such a thing again. actually honestly speaking, besides 403 and 404, the rest of the costumes were not to my liking. i thought 403's one was very very nice! heh!
anyway, i had this tattoo thing on my face because janine kindly plastered that on me! i thought it loked wonderful! lalala.
mrt-ed back with woon ki and camwhored all the way with my phone! lalalala.
later on, my mother drove my sisters and i to parkway to shop. oh oh, that was where my face was touched by 2 WOMEN! -.- all because of the national flag tattoo on my face! -.- haha.
my mother bought two dresses from there. so when we were in one of the shops right, my mother went to try on the dress in the fitting room. i was with my sisters waiting outside for my mother. the salesgirl then went to me and she talked to me! :) she said that i was tall (just because i was taller than her!) :)
then after a while, she continued on with the conversation
HER: *stared at me* WOAH SO PRETTY LEH!
ME: *i thought she was praising me so i smiled widely at her*
HER: this flag you paint yourself one ah!
ME: *on knowing that the flag was the subject and not me, i stopped smiling* nope, this is a tattoo!
then she proceeded on to touch the tattoo on my face! :( i was like feeling so awkward!
after buying the dress from this shop, we proceeded on to shop. we went inside another shop!
there was this mother with her baby boy in the shop. she told the baby boy to look at the flag on my face. after that, she walked up to me and touched the tattoo on my face before walking off. i was like stunned momentarily and gave her the -.- look. i think it is weird to touch people's face without their permission especially when both parties are strangers to one another, right?
haha moral of the story: do not tattoo yourself with a national flag on your face because you will invite weird stares and weird happenings! haha but the flag looks nice on the face! :)
went on to another shop to try on this dress. the dress is supposed to make one ANGELIC and CUTE and stuff but i looked fat in it -.- so obviously we did not buy it! the dress looks nice when no one is donning it! :)
so my mother, my sisters and i have come up with a dieting plan starting from this coming tuesday! hopefully, i can hit 45kg while still remaining at this height! :)

------------------ end of update -------------------
love,
shi tian

2009-07-14T21:07:00.002+08:00

:(
my younger sister is FREAKING selfish, freaking irritating.
i will never ever help her with any of her homework! irritating! :E

love,
shi tian

2009-07-09T22:06:00.001+08:00

'Cause I've had a bad day
I am taking one down

(changed the lyrics slightly)

WORST OF THE LOT, my foot. let me scoff at your sheer ignorance, you bigoted person! :(

love,
shi tian

2009-07-05T23:13:00.002+08:00

yo yo yo! i have not updated for so long but i care no longer.
today, we went to the grand mercure roxy hotel to eat our buffet lunch. we thought, or at least I thought, it was not worth the money. It costs $44 ++ per person to actually eat their buffet lunch. guess what? their spread is LIMITED to the max. ergh, furthermore, it was not as if the food was particularly tasty or something. haha. my mom and dad ordered red wine and white wine respectively. i drank 2 sips of the red wine. ewww... it tastes horrid. it is so bitter, i wonder what is the lure to it? haha. the waiter was serving my parents the wine, then i snatched the red wine and wanted to take a sip. guess what? the waiter kept staring at me as if i did something wrong. i kept laughing and laughing and laughing. haha. oooohhhh, our table was the dirtiest after everything, i think.
please lah, they do not even have Japanese cuisine or delicacies and they called it international buffet. :( oh, their cold crab was tasteless and hard to deal with. :P maybe, it is just me. i liked their mash potato, soy sauce fish and cream of potato. the choc fondue thing thing was self-service. quite cool!
my weight gained quite considerably after that! it is always the case. sigh. :)

lalala. stupid charlotte pangseh-ed me to go for some weird paper-cutting thing for the chinese thing thing. haiyah. actually, it is also because there weren't any other spaces available so i am going with xinle to the wednesday one! :)oh whatever.
lalala.

LOVE,
shi tian

2009-06-23T16:15:00.001+08:00

i have successfully shed some weight from around 52kg to less than 50kg. YAY! :)
now, i will maintain my weight without making it go lower or higher. GOOD JOB! :)

H1N1... hmmmm....

love,
shi tian